- Never suffocate your PurseLlama in a zipped-up purse or under a scarf or jacket. Seriously, it’s mostly for people to gawk at anyway. Some people drive a Ferrari so people will look at them. You have a PurseLlama. Be Proud.
- If asked to leave your PurseLlama behind, don’t make a scene. While a Dog Hostage can die of heat stroke in just a few minutes when left in a car, your PurseLlama can wait for you forever. Trust.
- Depending on who’s asking, there are two acceptable answers to the question:
“Is that a Llama in your purse?”
- Roll your eyes and curtly correct their mistake by informing them, “No. Actually, it’s Alpaca.” Your tone of voice should imply: Yes, I’m cooler than you, and no, you’ll never understand why.
- Happily agree and offer your PurseLlama’s name and ethnic origin: “Meet Guillermo. He’s Peruvian.” This usually throws people off enough to stop bothering you.
- A PurseLlama is NOT a toy. It is a fashion accessory, a political statement, a surrogate pet, a symbol of your contempt for sheepish fashion trends (read: Dog Hostages), but it is not a toy. As such, don’t let people “play” with it. Light petting, coddling, and “Llama-talk” is acceptable, but of course, only by people you trust – never let a stranger talk to your Llama.
